I Sucked



 

I sucked. 

Again.

After the tempo run crap, I was ready for a change. Today, 400m repeats were on the cards. I had planned to run down to the grass track near home, do 6 400m repeats with recovery time between, and then jog back.


Holy crap.

I sucked. 

Again.

I managed the first 400m loop, and then walk/jogged (yeah, I sucked so much I couldn’t even bring myself to jog). I managed the next 160m. I psyched myself up, tried again, and made it 130m. So I decided to drop it and try doing 300m repeats. I got 260m. Then 250m.

I sucked. 

Again.

I walked away from the track. And then I had a flash of inspiration. I was tired, shaky and cranky. But I turned back to the track, took off my watch, and ran an untimed 400m. I had one goal. Make it to the end.

And I did. It was slower. It was harder. But I made it.

And so, I have come to what I hope is a turning point in this new 10km training. I am going to run naked for awhile. I am not going to go out quite as hard, and I will pick a point to run to. When I do my tempo on Thursday, I am going to pick a landmark to run to. Next Tuesday, I will run 6 400m sets. The whole way around.

I sucked.

But next time will suck less. 


The end of a long day – still smiling.

 

Today’s moment

I have two!

I picked up a pair of Asics Gel-Kinetic 4s. The gym is selling donated new shoes for $25 and they happened to fit. The money will go to charity.

My new shoes!

My new shoes!

AND when I jogged down to the track this morning, a group of school-boys were using the path. When I ran through, they moved aside and clapped me as I passed. Too cute!

 

Your Turn!

When have you sucked? What did you do to suck less?
What are your favourite running shoes?
What makes you smile on a run?

 

32 comments

  1. jenna says:

    ohhh kate! you are so inspiring and wise! even when you don’t perform up the level you’d like, you still keep going and smiling! what a smart idea to just strip down and screw the timer! you only succeed as much as your brain tells you that you did, and i think youre succeeding every single day! keep on striving and believing in yourself. the imporovements will continue to come!! seeing little animals and nature on my runs was what would always make me smile big!!! <3

    • Kate says:

      Thank you! So much love on this post – I really wasn’t expecting it. Nature – perfect. Now who’s the wise one?! I’m going to appreciate nature more on my next run :-)

  2. Bean says:

    I loved that they clapped. I feel a round of applause should occur every time I finish a run. I had a time when I had to leave the garmin at home. I just got all obsessive, shocking I know, and felt I had to get faster every run and when I couldn’t I would get all freaked out and down on myself. So a few runs of just going till I wanted to turn around and run home regardless of pace/time seemed to do the trick. Just run to run because I like running. So long story short I am completely normal;). Nice shoe find!
    Bean recently posted The Lure of a DNFMy Profile

  3. Kat says:

    Yay for new shoes!! I hate speedwork?.its essential but it never doesn’t suck ;)
    Kat recently posted Fresh after my first half! Shower Pill reviewMy Profile

  4. Kierston says:

    I’m running for the first time since my half on Sunday…I will let you know if I sucked or not ;)

    I love my Mizuno Wave Inspires 8s….so do my feet!

    I’m supposed to smile while I run?! lol jk. Many things make me smile..whether it be the thought of something funny, the music I’m listening to or the company I have beside me :)
    Kierston recently posted Stop and #ENJOY!My Profile

    • Kate says:

      Oo I read about your Mizunos! Running shoes have to be the perfect fit – it’s like Cinderella. And while you smile all the time – there’s no way I was smiling during that run :-P

  5. LizForADay says:

    I pretty much suck at everything. But it OK, because I always do my best. :) I know that does not even sound right, but it is true. My favorite shows are my Sacounys. What makes me smile when I am running is when another runner gives me the thumbs up. :)

  6. Those boys are too cute! I think I may need to hire people to run behind me and clap so I get a nice confidence boost during my runs :) I recently bought a new pair of running shoes (because I was running in regular sneakers…I know, BAD) and I’m totally obsessed with them now – Nike Lunarswift 4. I swear by them. Good for you to keep on smilin’ – that’s definitely the way to be!
    Molly @ Just Your Average Athlete recently posted Skinnygirl Workout & Elf for Health ChallengeMy Profile

    • Kate says:

      Sounds like I have to try these Nikes – I’ve never heard of them. We all started in regular shoes – no sweat! And the boys were too cute. Come and run with me, we’ll make sure to get some applause!

  7. Amy Lauren says:

    My last run this morning wasn’t that great either, but I guess running is like pizza, even when it’s not so great its still pretty good :) . Hopefully our next ones will be better, it makes you appreciate the better runs to have a bad one every now and then.

    That’s neat that you got those new running shoes for so cheap even if they are just new to you, what a good idea for people to do when they get shoes and they don’t work for them but are still great, useful shoes.
    Amy Lauren recently posted Back to dignity and grace- back home to CharlestonMy Profile

  8. Kate you definitely do not suck! Remember that you just ran a marathon not too long ago and that your body is still recovering from that. It may take a little longer to get back up to speed. You’re doing great! Love the new shoes! My favorite shoes are Asics GT 2170′s…that they’ve discontinued. :-(
    Mindy @Road Runner Girl recently posted The Color Run New Orleans with Swiftwick!My Profile

  9. Mindy is right! It can take a full month to bounce back from the marathon. I had a rough run this morning too, and no excuse for it. :) You’re smart to run by feel and leave the Garmin at home next time.
    Awesome deal on the shoes!
    Laura @ Mommy Run Fast recently posted An Unconventional Marathon Training PlanMy Profile

  10. I think it’s pushing through the moments of feeling like you suck that are the most important, and that is exactly what you did. Actually sucking would have been not completing that last 400. What you did is actually called being awesome :)
    Ari @ Ari’s Menu recently posted Peanut Butter Chocolate Chunk CookiesMy Profile

  11. Elyse says:

    I want to give you a big hug! You so do not suck! Training is hard, especially when you are trying to go for time. I applaud your naked running efforts and you not giving up! Totally inspiring!
    Elyse recently posted Paleo and Me: My First Guest Post!My Profile

  12. You do NOT suck. I took me about a month to recover from my first marathon so be nice to yourself! :D

    As for speedwork, it hurts. Period. But if you want to get faster at the 10km distance you’ll need to learn to love the pain. It’s all about toeing the line of how much you can take before you feel like you’re going to die…or barf. It will always hurt but your tolerance for the pain will grow.

    My first foray into speedwork was much like yours. I sucked wind till I thought I was going to die. But I kept at it and that’s the key to getting better. Consistency.

    As for what makes me smile on a run: beautiful weather and friendly people. :D
    Phaedra @ Blisters and Black Toenails recently posted What Gets You Out of Bed?My Profile

  13. A little hard on yourself, aren’t you? Maybe you were trying to run too fast. You’re not supposed to run 400s all-out. Yes it’s supposed to be hard, but if you start like your doing a 50 yard dash you’re going to run out of gas real soon.

    Did you do any figuring to estimate how fast you should run. It’s easy to base it on your 5k pace, just to get an idea of where to start.
    Debbie @ Live from La Quinta recently posted Native Foods Is Back! Palm Springs Grand Pre-OpeningMy Profile

    • Kate says:

      Thank you. Always. I think you’re right. When I get back into it, I’m going to start slower and build up from there. And while I don’t have a 5km pace (far too short ;-) – I’m working on it!) I can use the Macmillan calculator.

  14. Mary says:

    Flip Kate – you don’t suck! You just ran a marathon!! You’re awesome!! I know sometimes we are unhappy with our performances on certain runs, but for every run that sucks, there’s another good one just waiting around the corner!

    LOVE your new shoes! I’m an Asics girl too!! They are my favourite running shoe and I’m sure largely responsible for me continuing with running!

    Dogs make me smile on my runs! I see LOTS of people out walking their dogs! I would love to have a dog, but my son has asthma and has been allergic to other pets, so it would be a very expensive chance to take! I have to make do with my boss’s dog at work (a black lab) and any dogs I encounter on my runs.
    Mary recently posted Guilty PleasuresMy Profile

    • Kate says:

      Best advice! Ok – flipping. And you’re right – I’m switching tempo for an easy run tomorrow and I’m going to enjoooooy it :-D . I miss having pets too :-( .

  15. Amy says:

    You definitely do not suck Miss Kate!
    You have achieved so much over the past 12 months – thinking back, did any of those things start off easily? Or did they require sweat, determination, and a learning curve? You are just taking on another adventure and any destination that you really want to arrive at is worth the journey, no matter how hard the road might be at the beginning.
    You go Kate, and we will cheer you on :)
    Amy recently posted At Her Table: Caramelised Onion and Cumin SconesMy Profile

  16. I only run naked, so freeing.
    As in I own no sort of Garmin. Sometimes it is just good to listen to your body
    Abby @ BackAtSquareZero recently posted Relief, HappinessMy Profile

  17. thank GAWDDDD u ditched that darn watch and the load of stress that comes with it! seriously, it happens to SOO many of us, getting hung up on the flipping times messes with our heads and mentally defeats us before the workout even has a chance to! so don’t let the stupid watch dictate ur runs…just run hard. hey, pretty sure there were runners doing workouts before garmins and all that pace obsessed number shiznit. ;) keep it up girl1

    • Kate says:

      Yes! It’s odd though – I wasn’t really watching the watch. It just felt like a burden. So that’s the end of that for awhile! And yep – you and my Dad should talk ;-) .

  18. ummm BEST PLAN ever. You rock at fixing problems. I reckon some “free running” and taking that whole mental aspect out of it for a bit will be so refreshing and let you find your groove again. The thing is you are probably not sucking at all just psyched out… (high expectations?). I think Mindy and Laura raised a good point too re: marathon recovery time so be patient with your body too.

    What a shoe score!!!! I am an Asics girl too. I love to perve at all kinds of shoes but at the end of the day there is only one pair for me!!!!

    Can’t wait to hear how you enjoy the “naked” running!!!
    Jenelle @ MummyLovesToRun recently posted I just got the hang of that!My Profile

    • Kate says:

      Thanks Jenelle! Weirdly, that lawyer training has paid off in some strange ways – including problem solving in the oddest situations! Finding the right shoes is a cinderella journey – no question.

  19. I’m in the Asics club with you – I love those! Super cute.
    I smiled at the school-boys clapping, awch!

    And, I agree with everything Cait said up there^. I’m so glad you got rid of the watch! The numbers can just take over sometimes when at the end of the day, you pushed through and did your best! And heeey, you’re still smiling :D
    TorontoRunner recently posted Mom & Me Day!My Profile

  20. Amalia says:

    Oh Kate my dear!

    I feel so bad for not reading and keeping up lately especially since you have been feeling so run-crappy. Just remember that this too shall pass and these small bumps in the road with so many challenges are what makes it so great when things go well! I’m thinking of you in this awful Canadian weather and sending you lots of love!!!
    Amalia recently posted SuccessMy Profile

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